You Are A Good Mom

I have been holding onto this post for a while now. Debating whether or not to post it. I originally started this blog post with a long backstory of our particular struggles with Maxine and her feedings. And how much pressure I felt to continue in a feeding method that was just not working for us. But it felt too soap-boxy. Too ranty. And that's not what I want. We all get enough shaming and judgement from the world for just about every decision we make as a parent. You don't need me ranting too. I don't want to be just another voice adding to the noise.

We need a lot less judging, and a lot more supporting. We need a lot less pressuring, and a lot more understanding. We need a lot less shaming, and a lot more love.

So with that in mind...

To the mom who breastfeeds her baby: 

Breastfeeding is not always easy. Sometimes it is downright hard. You are making a hard decision to keep breastfeeding through the difficult times. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good mom.

To the mom who exclusively pumps:

Pumping is exhausting. You are making a hard decision to continue pumping even though you have wanted to quit so many times. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good mom.

To the mom who supplements with formula:

Going back and forth between two forms of feeding can be hard. You are giving your baby the benefits of breastmilk, and the necessary calories and benefits of formula. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good mom.

To the mom who exclusively uses formula:

If this isn't what you wanted, the guilt can be so hard. And if this is what you chose to do, the shaming can be intense. You are making a decision to do what works best for you and your baby. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good mom.

To the mom who feeds her baby through a feeding tube:

I know that this isn't what you wanted. You are making a hard decision so your baby can thrive. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good mom.

And to all the dads out there who are either primary caregivers, or standing alongside and supporting these hard feeding decisions:

You are supporting your family. You are feeding your baby. And you are a good dad.

Please don't let the surrounding guilts and pressures overwhelm you. Instead, ask yourself these questions:

Is my baby fed?

Is my baby happy?

Is my baby thriving?

Regardless of which feeding method you are using, being able to say "yes" to these questions is truly what is best.

-Sarah